A sense of ritual

A family without a sense of ritual can not raise a happy child

Actor Huang Lei once said in “The Wonderful Story”: “If there is a man to marry my daughter one day and he said no wedding, then I will tell my daughter: Don\'t marry him! I don\'t even have the sense of ritual. I don\'t think it is right.”

In Huang Lei’s view, the wedding is the most important “ritual” for husband and wife. Ceremony is a word that many people often overlook. In fact, in a boring life, we all need a proper sense of ritual to spend a dull day. In the boring life, occasional surprises and ritual feelings will give the children enough closeness and trust, and let the children feel happiness and fun.

[A child who is two or three years old has a birthday, is it necessary to be so grand?]

[“The child is so small that they can\'t remember it.”]

[“To put it bluntly, you are doing formalism!”]

During the family gathering, relatives learned that I started to celebrate my daughter’s birthday with a big fandom a month ago, and all of them came to persuade me that “is not neccessary”.

“Little Prince” wrote: The sense of ritual is that one day is different from other days, making a certain moment different from other moments. I want my daughter to remember this different moment from the past, remember our intentions and favors for her, and remember this attitude towards life. At each ordinary and repetitive days, you can live is not the same, can live more interesting and well-being.

She likes Princess Aisha, buys a little dress of Princess Aisha, makes a cake of Aisha Princess, and dresses her home as a fairytale castle.

In the photos of the year, choose some cute, funny, memorable photos and assemble them into a book. After my daughter was born, I always had the habit of helping her to write a diary in WeChat, which was printed on the birthday.

NO.1

☞ The sense of ritual is a pass of love

In the movie “Miracle Boy”, after his brother Augie was born, his face was deformed and he underwent 27 large and small operations. Thus, the parents poured more effort and time into him. As sister Via said, “Augie is the little sun of our family.” In the long run, parents will inevitably ignore their sister Via.

On the first day of school, everyone was busy cheering for Augie, asking him about his feelings at school, but forgot to ask Via, “How are you doing at school?”

Good friends suddenly ignored themselves, and Via was troubled by friendship for a long time. Mom said that she was accompanying her on Halloween, but she left because the school called to say that her brother had disappeared. As a result, the contradiction between Via and her parents, especially her mother, has increased dramatically. She even thinks that Mom and Dad only love her brother. Only the grandmother who passed away is the only one who loves her. Later, Via participated in the school\'s theatrical performances. After the parents learned, they took the younger brother to dress up and cheered for Via. The ceremony was full of feelings, giving Via a chance to reconcile with her parents, and let Via feel the full love of her parents.

Writer Lin Wanyang said that the sense of ritual is to let us have the perception of love and to feel the world with our heart.

The sense of ritual, let the children feel the love of their parents, and have a sense of love and happiness, so that parents and children re-establish a bond of love.

NO.2

☞ Sense of ritual, is a family tradition of heritage

The cultural program “Family China” once invited Dong Shuping to tell Dong Jia\'s 60 years of bookkeeping history.

Father began to book accounts in 1957.

She began to book accounts in 1973.

The daughter began to book accounts in 2001.

Father\'s bookkeeping, daughter\'s bookkeeping, granddaughter\'s account book...

Open a small account, covering large and small revenues and expenditures, such as salary income, buying food, buying a TV set, buying a house, it also records the life journey of children born, read, married, and have children.

Turning over the small books and looking back at the life, Dong Shuping said: My father and mother are double-employed, and the income is not bad. But from the perspective of expenditure, it is responsible for the expenditure of eight people, and even more. Parents are busy with work, can\'t take care of our four brothers and sisters, can only ask the nurse, the four of us did not eat the mother\'s milk.

Dr. Barbara Fiese and her team have been working on the study of “family ritual inheritance”, it is found that the family “ceremonial feeling” has a strong “bonding” effect, allowing members to experience a sense of belonging and security. And that small account also carries the trust and respect of both husband and wife. Heritage of a “thrifty” family tradition, but also inherited the business management of married life.

Writer Ma Boyan once wrote: The inheritance of a family is like a good antique. It has been pampered and polished by many people, and it has been silently accumulated in a long time. Slowly, become the spiritual bond between family members, and even become part of their character and even their destiny. Parenting, practicing the good qualities and habits that have been passed down from generation to generation, and passing them on to future generations, is the best gift for future generations.

NO.3

☞A sense of ritual will create a unique happy memory

A few days ago, I saw a news on Weibo. A mother from Nanjing sent a unique dowry on the day of her daughter’s marriage: A record of 200,000 words of daughter growth.

This growth record carries the memories of her daughter.

My daughter started to have teeth for 4 months.

When she was 7 months old, she knew how to say “goodbye”.

My daughter will call “Mother and Dad” in 9 months.

My daughter is a bit solitary, and I encourage her to go out to play with children of the same age. In the beginning, in order to exercise her initiative to get close to the children, I also played with her with the children, and then gradually let go.

On the yellowed paper of that page, it records the growth of her daughter in the past 27 years, a small progress, a small secret. Through every word on the growth record, every picture on the road of growth seems to travel through time and space, presented in front of her daughter.

The Atlanta Daily newspaper in the United States once did a research, found the happiness of “gathering stories and memories” at home is far better than material satisfaction, even in academic or career achievements. This growth record left a good memory for her daughter. After her daughter grew up, she created a unique happiness for her.

☞ The sense of ritual makes the child happier

Teacher Yin Jianli, a child educator, once mentioned a little story about her daughter\'s Yuan Yuan. From the age of two, they prepared a gift every Christmas and told her that it was “sent by the grandfather of Christmas.” Yuan Yuan feels amazing and very happy, full of expectations for Christmas: Looking at Christmas with my fingers, she will tell her wish list over and over again before Christmas, and then she can\'t wait to verify whether the Christmas grandfather has given her a gift.

Yin Jianli said that children are not living for “growth” and should live for “childhood”. She just wants to help her daughter retain more fairy-tale happiness, a little more, and a little more. Even if Yuan Yuan later ignorantly knew that Santa Claus was fictional, she still enjoyed the little surprises that her parents brought him. After many years, the grown-up Yuan’s has a happiness and began to create surprises for others. She will quietly send a special gift on the birthday of a good friend. She even sent a bunch of flowers to her mother in the name of her father when Dad forgot her mother\'s birthday.

The German writer Lorelis once wrote that a life with a sense of ritual makes us feel a sense of existence.

From now on, give the child a ritual full of life.

Well, the story finished it will begin selling ads, lol.

Christmas is coming, are you preparing gifts for your children? In my memory, my mother once sent me a car, a plush ball. The plush soccer is very warm, much like the mother\'s hand. Now we are launching a new product, colorful plush soccer. It has a soft touch and can take care of the child instead of mother\'s hand.